Category: Coddiwomple
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On the Way Down
At this moment, I am living in a déjà vu. A loading matrix. It hit me on a sunset bike ride this week. While making my first documentary, Preventable, I was crushed inside this suffocating capsule. I was heartbroken, homesick for a place that wasn’t actually home, fighting for my life, and wondering why I…
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After We’re Gone
Most of us watch movies to escape life. The popcorn in our laps, the dim lights fraying reality. It’s a way to pretend the outside world isn’t still swirling on. As the plot unfolds, we cling to these characters. Invested in their wellbeing, their dreams, their adversities, they become our triumphs, our loss. I think…
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Leaning In
Narcissus, in greek mythology, is a god who falls in love with his reflection. Enthralled by his outer beauty, he sits by a bank of water and stares at his face in the water’s reflection, ignoring any hunger or thirst. He eventually dies right there, unable to meet his bodies needs because he was so…
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In Remission
This word, remission, is highly associated with cancer patients. They get to ring a gong and celebrate the absence of their sickness. And after weeks, even months, of being tethered to chemo, hospital beds, and treatment schedules, they are thrust back into the world. Believe it or not, that is petrifying. When all you know…
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The Parting Glass
As I plan out every detail of this upcoming documentary, I can’t help but reminisce about my first trip around the world. There were moments, since the day I published my old Preventable website, where I could feel failure breathing down my neck. I wasn’t raising enough money. I was heartbroken from a sudden separation…
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Prisoner of War
I recently came across a piece of work that spoke about war heroes. Many were men who had been held captive and tortured for long periods of time. One such man was high-ranking naval officer, Jeremiah Denton. His plane went down over northern Vietnam, forcing himself to eject before it crashed. He and his co-pilot…
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Peter Panning
Topical Steroid Withdrawal is a large facet of my life, an overarching theme that overshadows the rest. Over the summer, I tried running from it. I didn’t want to talk about it, think about it, argue about it, post about it. I just wanted to be. As if it were behind me. Then, boom, a…
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When Grief is Like Glitter
There comes a time when everything reminds you of what you’ve lost. You can think positive thoughts, you can recite affirmations, but they aren’t able to fill the void. It’s hollow and echoes when you call out for help. During this time, it’s winter. It’s a barren, leafless forrest where you pray for sunlight and…
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Censored Skin
At the beginning of October, I gave in and downloaded Tik Tok. I didn’t want another app that would essentially suck up my time, but it was Eczema Awareness Month, and I wanted to reach as many people as possible. Hence, my Tik Tok account went live. I had no idea what I was doing.…
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Perfection is a Sickness
I always thought it was everyday people who perpetuated the need to have beautiful skin. To have it glow, be silky-smooth, and never have a blemish in sight. But maybe I am wrong. Maybe it starts inside a doctor’s office. Ever since being diagnosed with Topical Steroid Withdrawal almost eight years ago, it’s as if…